Mary Anne Maupin Gillum

Beloved Wife and Mother

Dec 10, 1939 – Jan 11, 2022

Since Mary Anne was no ordinary wife and mother, she will not get an ordinary obituary. In addition to the normal traditional obituary style summary of Mary Anne’s life I am going to share Mary Anne’s own words that she wrote in December 2020 before she had her brain surgery in January 2021. Following that you will see my response to her obituary that I wrote on the day she entered the hospital prior to her brain surgery. Following that will be some updated thoughts and reflections that I have had since her passing to try and summarize the many, many blessings that God has bestowed upon us before He called my beloved wife home to her Heavenly reward. Following that is my One Last Request poem to honor and cherish Mary Anne.

Traditional Style

Mary Anne Maupin Gillum, 82, passed away peacefully Tuesday, January 11, 2022 at her home in Virginia Beach, Virginia supported by her family after battling metastatic melanoma. Mary Anne was born December 10, 1939 to John S and Hester Hammonds Maupin in Stanford, Kentucky and graduated from Stanford High School and later attended Eastern Kentucky University.

While working at the Kentucky School for the Deaf (KSD) Mary Anne met Virgil David Gillum, her future husband of almost fifty-one years. The couple was blessed with one child, a daughter, Mary Jane Gillum. Additionally, Mary Anne adopted several four-legged family members over the years, most recently spoiling the family Boston (Star) and Yorkie (Rosie).

Deciding to devote her life to caring for her family, Mary Anne spent years performing volunteer work in Girl Scouts where she served as Brownie and Junior Troop Leader and as the first Daisy Troop Leader in the Kings Grant Service Unit where she also served as Service Unit Manager. She also served as the Chairman for the Girl Scouts 75th Jubilee celebration in 1987 for the Colonial Coast Girl Scouts Council held at the Hampton Coliseum.  Later she served as chaperone on multiple junior and high school competition band trips while volunteering weekly with other parents at the bingo hall to subsidize these school trips.

Mary Anne was raised in the McKendree Methodist Church in Hubble, Kentucky and after her marriage attended the First Church of God with her husband. After the Navy brought the family to Virginia Beach they attended the First Church of God in Norfolk, Virginia where Mary Anne was involved in community outreach, served on the Church’s Executive Board including terms as Department Head and Executive Board Chairman. Mary Anne also fulfilled her love of children by working with the children both in the nursery and as a Sunday School teacher. Later years would see her and David attending church closer to home when they became members of the Foundry United Methodist Church in Virginia Beach.

In addition to being predeceased by her parents, Mary Anne was additionally preceded in death by her sister Nancy Allen Grimes and three brothers-in-law (Mick Brown, Bill Gillum, and Kirby Grimes). Left to cherish her memory is her husband David and daughter Mary Jane as well as her three sisters-in-law (Bonnie Brown, Melba Runyon, and Cathy Gillum), surviving brother-in-law (Chuck Runyon), and her eight nieces and nephews and their families.

Anyone desiring to make a memorial contribution in Mary Anne’s memory can send it to St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, one of Mary Anne’s favorite charities, in hopes of finding a cure for cancer.

A Celebration of Life for Mary Anne will be held later this year when the weather is warmer and the COVID-19 restrictions are reduced. Interment in the Lancaster Cemetery in Lancaster, Kentucky will be performed at some future date.

Mary Anne’s own words (written in Dec 2020)

Who am I?

I’m a Homemaker.

I was raised on a farm in Lincoln County, KY with loving parents who passed the values of family and love of God down to me.

Worshiping God and being in church came first, family second with love and forgiveness for everyone. We were a large family with lots of cousins, lots of neighbors who we cared about, and also many pets and I can say that I loved them all.

This is what made me as I am today. I am Mary Anne Maupin, wife of David Gillum and Mother to Mary Jane Gillum. I was born Dec 10, 1939. I am eighty-one years old.

David’s response on JAN 17, 2021 (the day Mary Anne was admitted to the hospital for brain surgery)

Mary Anne,

Who are you? Let me tell you who you are. You are God’s missionary to me. God trained you for your missionary assignment by providing you Christian parents, a childhood in a rural Kentucky environment where people cared for each other and He also provided you a caring heart.

With you being a little older and more mature than I was as a college student, God recognized my need for someone who would join me on life’s journey and help me to mature and grow in my love for Him and you. Throughout our 50+ years of knowing and growing together. I have truly been blessed to have enjoyed the many blessings we have received from God. While there have been some temporary setbacks and failures like my failure to be promoted on Active Duty, God turned this failure into a series of blessings by allowing me to stay in the Naval Reserve and get promoted there. He also provided me the opportunity to become a civil servant and remain in our home in Virginia Beach for 41 years and find local churches where we could serve Him and use the talents He gave both of us.

You were able to serve Him as a Nursery worker and Sunday School teacher while leading and teaching Mary Jane about God’s goodness and forgiveness. Your servant’s heart and care for others, especially the unfortunate and the family pets who relied on you for their well-being because Mary Jane and I were too busy to properly care for them is evident by the way Rosie and Star follow you around now.

Has our life together been perfect? No, but it was never expected to be perfect. Was it loving and rewarding? Absolutely! I have truly been blessed on my life’s journey by sharing it with someone who truly cared for me and loved me despite my faults and tendency to procrastinate. Together we have had a very successful journey so far and it is not done. When I became a kid again and started playing senior softball you were always there to support and encourage me along the way. The family softball trips were more meaningful to me because my family was there to share the experience with me.

We have been blessed to have had relatively healthy lives and even the few illnesses and accidents we have had were opportunities to get to know some new and caring people. At this point all I can really say is that I have been truly blessed to have you as my wife for almost a full 50 years and I want those blessings to continue for a little while longer.

I am praying that God will remove your headaches, restore your strength, and allow you to restore your self-sufficient abilities so you can continue to share your love and affection for our family and others. Yes, you are now over 80 and you have slowed down some but that does not mean that your mission is over. One of the lessons you taught me early on was “Mind Over Matter!” I did not fully understand that saying for a long time until I saw you display it several times when you were ill or not feeling well. Now I am asking and praying that God will provide you the strength and healing required so that once again you can display that “Mind Over Matter!” does work (with God’s help of course).

I don’t say it often enough, but I do think that you know that I truly love you both as my wife and the Mother of our daughter. You are truly a blessing to me. I love you!!  – David

Updated Thoughts and Reflections 

Now as Paul Harvey used to say “Here’s the rest of the story.”

Following a mostly successful brain surgery on 1/18/21 to remove a cancerous brain tumor God answered my prayer to allow Mary Anne to live until Feb 13, 2021 so we could celebrate our 50^th wedding anniversary. Every day beyond that was considered a bonus. She lived 1 week short of a full year after her brain surgery. After 2 months in the hospital and a Rehab Facility Mary Anne came home and went through 3 months of home health rehabilitation where she was able to eventually apply her “Mind Over Matter” philosophy as she learned to walk again with the aid of a walker. One of her proudest achievements was when she was able to successfully maneuver herself out of her wheelchair and into our Ford F150 truck so that she could then leave the house and we could take her for rides to the stores and to McDonald’s to get Double Cheeseburgers for Star and Rosie.

After Mary Anne regained enough strength to visit her doctors, she discovered that some of the cancer had spread and despite some treatments it got progressively worse. In October she entered the Amedisys At Home Hospice Program of palliative care aimed at providing comfort and quality of life care for her end-of-life journey. This Team of caring and compassionate caregivers achieved their goal and helped ensure (with God’s help) that Mary Anne had a peaceful passing. My sincere thanks and appreciation go to ALL the wonderful Hospice “angels” involved in her care along with a special acknowledgement of the services provided by Calli McBride (RN) who served as Mary Anne’s Case Manager and Rhonda Chamberlain who served as Mary Anne’s Personal Needs Aide for their compassionate and attentive care for Mary Anne and their patience in dealing with me as I learned how to be the caregiver that Mary Anne deserved.

Here is a sincere “Thank You” to all of the people who have supported Mary Anne and our family this past year. Your encouragement, thoughts, and prayers have certainly made this difficult journey much more palatable.

One Last Request (Poem by David) 

Mary Anne loved her cardinals
As you can plainly see.
Her Mother often told her
“When you see one think of me.” 

Now I’m tweaking that request
And doing it the best I can.
“Whenever you see a cardinal
Please think of Mary Anne.” 

If you will kindly do that
A smile might cross your face,
If you will just stop and think
She’s now in a better place.

Yes, she’s gone on to her reward
And she’s waiting there for me,
So we can be together again
For all eternity.

Memorial Service

A memorial service to celebrate Mary Anne’s life and the blessings she provided to others will be held on Saturday, June 25, 2022 at 2:00 p.m. at Foundry United Methodist Church located at 2801 Virginia Beach Blvd, Virginia Beach, VA 23452. Church telephone number is 757-340-0595.

Cancer Won the Battle – But Jesus Won the War
David’s Tribute to Mary Anne (6/25/2022)

Cancer is a cruel disease
Of that there is no doubt.
For usually in the end
It thinks it has won out.

But I have news for Cancer
That will put it in its place.
Mary Anne had a special card
That was better than an Ace.

Although Cancer took her body
Which made me very sad;
Jesus took her Soul
And that made me very glad.

So now Mary Anne is in Heaven
And she’s waiting there for me.
Her body once had some pain
But from pain she’s been set free.

Thank you, Jesus, for your blessings
That you give to us each day,
But most of all I thank you
For sending Mary Anne my way.

Together we were able
To do a lot of things,
Once you brought us both together
To exchange our wedding rings.

You kept us both together
For over fifty years.
We had a lot of laughs
And shed a lot of tears.

Today more tears will come
And it’s OK to cry.
It’s not a sign of weakness
When your eyes cannot stay dry.

You gave us the gift of crying
To celebrate both good and bad.
So, let’s focus on the good times
Instead of what makes us sad.

This life is just a journey,
But with you serving as our guide,
When we come to the end of it
Others can look at us with pride.

Did we help our fellow travelers
Whom we met along this race?
Yes, Mary Anne certainly did that
With a smile upon her face.

Although her body’s returned to dust,
Her memory will still be there
In the minds of those who knew her
And her tender loving care.

Proverbs 12:4 “A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband …”

Mary Anne’s Urn
(My Country Girl and Her Cardinals)