Donnie James Gray, 78, was called home to be with his Lord and Savior on Sunday, March 22, 2026. Donnie was blessed to leave this world in the church he loved so much, Beach Fellowship, surrounded by people he loved and who loved him. He was born on July 17, 1947 in Elizabeth City, North Carolina, the son of the late Harold C. Gray and Joyce Johnson Gray Caswell.
He was preceded in death by his beloved son, James Kyle Gray; his paternal grandmother, Maria Gray; and his maternal grandparents, Nelson Peter Johnson and Katherine Bagley Johnston. He was also predeceased by numerous aunts, uncles, and cousins.
Left to cherish his memory are his loving wife, Linda; sister, Caryn Pandullo (Sam); aunt, Jaqueline Jacobs; daughter-in-law, Vicki Lynn Gray; nephew, Joseph Scarborough; and many special cousins.
Donnie is also survived by Kelly McKay, who was welcomed by both Donnie and Linda into their home at the age of 16 and has been like a daughter to them ever since. Donnie and Linda both enjoyed being a part of Kelly’s life over the years and she and her family held a very special place in Donnie’s heart. Kelly and her husband, Manuel Alves; son, Jakob James Antonio Alves; and daughter, Lilli Danner Fowler (Jake) reside in California.
Donnie graduated from Cape Hatteras School in the class of 1965. After graduation, he attended East Carolina College and then worked for the U.S. Postal Service and the North Carolina Ferry Division before enlisting in the Coast Guard in 1970. He received many accolades and citations during his enlistment. His career took them to many interesting places. They were stationed in Washington DC, Tachikawa, Japan, Governor’s Island, New York, and Santa Rosa, California. He was transferred to Chesapeake, Virginia where he retired in 2000 as CWO4.
He married his high school sweetheart and the love of his life, Linda Scarborough, in September 3, 1966. This year, they would have celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary. Donnie was a loving husband and father, and he did not take his responsibilities lightly. He always provided well for his family and was right beside Linda caring for both her parents and her uncle during their battle with cancer. He was a caregiver for his mother for many years, and family and friends knew they could depend on him to help in any way he could.
He coached Kyle in many seasons of Little League baseball, basketball, and football and was always there for guidance and support as Kyle moved on to junior and high school sports. He gave many hours to activities in Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts. Together they restored a 1973 Chevy Nova, which was Kyle’s pride and joy.
At times Donnie could be prickly on the outside, but his heart was soft and he had a kind word and a smile for almost everyone. He had a very soft spot for children and people in need. He would go out of his way to help animals, even stopping traffic to move a turtle out of the road.
A celebration of life service will be held on April 18, 2026 at 2:00 p.m. at Beach Fellowship Church located at 1817 General Booth Blvd, Virginia Beach, VA 23454, 757-721-7388. Those in attendance are invited to join the family for refreshments in the Cafe after the service.